08 April 2014

some memories

hey there little neglected blog, how are you? it's nice to see you again. let's move passed the awkwardness of me ignoring you for months and move on to some memories to be documented, shall we? 

in February, we went on our second annual family weekend away. when ruby was diagnosed with SMA last year, we went to a resort (the same one we got married at) for a weekend. it was great to get away, spend some QT (quality time, in T Sun language), swim, and just relax. this year, we thought we should continue the tradition and decided to take in a weekend at the Dells and do some indoor waterpark fun. ruby loved it, of course. it was, indeed, fun to get away and have some uninterrupted family time. 

when we were at one if the kiddie pools the second day, ruby was playing in the water & I was watching her watch all the other kids run around and splash. I suddenly got so, so sad. I was probably completing projecting this on her & she was likely just happy to be sitting in the water, crawling around. but I told T that I wondered if she was wishing she could be running around, too. and all of the sudden, I was in tears. Terence was amazing, like he always is. he went and got ruby & they played like crazy in the water, for a good hour. she was laughing so hard and loving every minute of it. I said back and cried, feeling thankful for what a great dad T is and also recognizing that my 7 month pregnant hormones were also at play here. eventually I relaxed & just enjoyed watching them play. they were running under these huge buckets of water that would fill up & the eventually dump out on their victims below. a dad came up to me & said "what a brave little girl you have there! my 7 year old won't go anywhere near those." I smiled and remarked that that is ruby's natural way. she is always looking for more fun, something new, and she doesn't let anything hold her back. it was a godsent moment for that guy to remark that ruby is brave, though. I needed to hear those words, even if he had no idea the impact they had on me in the moment. 

that was also the first weekend that we took ruby out with just her wheelchair and no option to push her in the stroller. she wanted to use her chair so that's what we did. on our way back on Sunday, we stopped by an outlet mall and ruby got to do some shopping, independently, in her chair. it was so much fun to see her roll around and look at the things she wanted to check out (disney toys, hair accessories, sunglasses) without asking me to take her "over there, mama! look over here!" I got a sweet pictures of her checking out some headbands and I love how it shows her slowly figuring out her own ways to be independent. 

some moments are hard. some memories are like a punch to the guy. but overall, we are so grateful for ruby's health and pray that baby boy coming in just a few weeks will be given respiratory strength and a fighting spirit, like his sister. I have no doubt she will teach him all sorts of things that their dad and I can't. I know they will fill a spot in each other's lives that no one else can fill. and I know that they both do that for their dad and me. 

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